Thursday, February 14, 2008

Valentine's Day Special

Depending on your relationship status it's either Valentine's Day or Singles Awareness Week. In honor of the occasion, Cupid has come to the blog.

Picture of valentines day candy hearts.

A couple of weeks ago I was having coffee with the most downloaded woman on Craig Smith's Blog. While reading the L.A. Times I came across this article about, an online dating site where prisoners can look for love.

Now, let me tell you a little secret about the most downloaded woman on Craig Smith's Blog. One of her guilty pleasures, besides watching the Food Network, is watching what I call "cell block" documentaries. These are TV shows, often shown late at night on cable channels like MSNBC, which document life inside prisons. "Lock-up" and "Inside San Quentin" are a couple that come to mind.

Anyway, I showed her the article about who was trying to hook up in the lock-up via figuring that it would interest her.

"Thank God I'm not that desperate!" she exclaimed after reading a few paragraphs. Wait a minute. She's not that desperate? (Implying that there is a certain level of despair that exists somewhere beneath the surface although it falls somewhat short of being that desperate?)

I know I'm not "prison meat" but then again I'm not exactly chopped liver either.

Guess I better return that diamond bracelet I was going to give her for Valentine's Day.

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In reading the article about what amazed me was the implication that the more notorious the criminal, the more cyber suitors they seem to attract. In other words while I'm getting hate mail, Scott Peterson, the Menendez Brothers and Ted Bundy are being flooded with love letters.

Now, if I could add a couple of felony convictions to my resume I could probably qualify for a free lifetime membership at and years of e-mails from adoring fans.

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So what do you think of the high price of those Valentine's Day roses? 51 weeks of the year a bouquet of a dozen roses can be had for as little as $20. But according to Edhat's Valentine's Day rose survey, the average going price around Santa Barbara for a dozen roses purchased for Valentine's Day is $83.28.

It pays to be willing to drive to Carpinteria, where at $31.00 Padaro Floral had the lowest price among the florists surveyed. The dubious distinction of having the highest priced rose bouquet was shared by Kaleidoscope Flowers and Renae's Bouquet where those roses will set you back $125.00. At that price they better come with a "get lucky" guarantee.

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Are News-Press readers not showing enough love for the News-Press Reader's Poll?

The ballots for the poll, in which readers vote on their favorite local businesses, have been taking the form of full-page ads in the paper. As an incentive to get readers to vote the News-Press is offering prizes. A 50" Plasma HDTV from Holser & Bailey, a trip for two to Honolulu from the Santa Barbara Travel Bureau, and a year of free ice cream from McConnell's.

And what, no category for best blog?

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Just in time for Valentine's Day: Appeals court overturns Texas ban on sex toys.

Finally, Texans can buy a vibrator just as easily as they can buy a hand gun.
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Do you think the representatives of the News-Press and the Teamsters exchanged Valentines when they sat down across from each other at the bargaining table to negotiate this morning?